“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” stated a collected Franklin Delano Roosevelt, his visage abruptly wan as he remembered the warm water brain eating amoeba. A sheer panic emerged and Roosevelt’s eyes darted toward several members of the crowd. “We have to boil the water, you idiots!!” he screamed, jumping off of the stage and pushing people to the ground as he sped like greased lightning back to the White House. District of Columbia Fire and EMS treated minor injuries at the scene.