Category: The Real Mews
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“Tin Can Mike” de Nostredame
Today human history was altered in a way that even philosopher and se’er Nostradamus wouldn’t predict – or should we say – couldn’t predict. That’s because historians have finally unearthed the truth about Mr. Damus. Rare parchments were discovered in the cellars of the University of Montpellier last week that confirm a truth scholars have suspected…
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The Incredible Story of Susan Dunderman
The world of classical music was shattered today, like a defective pane of chemically strengthened glass, as historians admitted that superstar Johann Sebastian Bach neither wrote nor sang his own music. Like numerous classical music lip-syncers before him, Mr. Bach was a fraud, a fact exposed after a repository of documents believed to be written…
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Horsancing 4.Infinity
Two weeks ago, The Real Mews was the first to report on a trend that swept the nation called horsancing — and the horsancer who made it famous, Gemma Coghlan. Horsancing, as we all know, is the well curated art of standing up while riding on a moving horse, and then dancing like a lunatic.…
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The Rescuer Up Yonder
The next time you hear a loud whoosh in the sky over your head – look up! You might see Silicon Valley octillionaire Bill Lagos riding around on his brand new biologically engineered eagle! Yup, you read that right: The world’s most privileged people are now breeding genetically modified creatures and flying them over your…
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A Sad Day for Horsancing
In breaking news, we have an unlikely and heartbreaking follow up to a story last week featuring The Angel of Horsancing. Gemma Coghlan, that very angel, has fallen to her demise after trying to dance while on a moving horse. Unfortunately, her passing was quite public, seen by hundreds of thousands of spectators as she performed…
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Horse Dancing Comes to the Arena
This Saturday and Sunday only, the downtown arena is hosting an event highlighting the extraordinary art of horse dancing. Come see local legends not only stand up on a moving horse, but complete unique and complex choreographed dance routines. Watch in amazement as they triple flip into the air, land on different horses, and proceed…
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Enter the Declan
Hello everyone. It is I, Borton Brahms, award winning restaurateur and — after last night’s winning bid — the proud new owner of over nine hundred broken smart phones. Welcome to my column, The Devilish Dish. I come to you today bereft of my normal gruff charm and, in all honesty, a little bit confused.…
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Crowd Control to Major Tom
Today, self-proclaimed musical genius and social media influencer, ZodokSnore967, broke news that he’d in fact figured out the secret meaning to David Bowie’s classic hit, Space Oddities. Rather than get to the point, however, he opened with a rambling diatribe about an isolated comment left on one of his videos, and then through an even longer…
The Real Mews 